OK, so you may have just found out that someone you know and love is harming themselves. Cutting or burning their skin, banging their head, maybe even overdosing on sedative medications.
I am going to out myself today as one of these people.
Here’s some things you need to know:
1. Self-harm is different from suicide
Most people doing some or all of the above do not intend to kill themselves.
It was requested for me to write about having a safety plan in order. I looked all over for mine, but could not find it 
Go figure.
There are basically 2 types of Safety Plans, one is your basic Safety Plan and the other is a Suicide Prevention Contract.
The following is an example of a Safety Plan
Sample Safety Plan
Step 1: Warning signs (thoughts, images, mood, situation, behavior) that a crisis may be developing:
1. _____________________________________________________________________________________________ 2. _____________________________________________________________________________________________ 3. _____________________________________________________________________________________________
Step 2: Internal coping strategies – Things I can do to take my mind off my problems without contacting another person (relaxation technique, physical activity):
1. _____________________________________________________________________________________________ 2. _____________________________________________________________________________________________ 3. _____________________________________________________________________________________________
Step 3: People and social settings that provide distraction:
1. Name____________________________________________________ Phone______________________________
2. Name____________________________________________________ Phone______________________________
3. Place__________________________________________
4. Place______________________________________
Step 4: People whom I can ask for help:
1.Name____________________________________________________ Phone______________________________ 2.Name____________________________________________________ Phone______________________________ 3.Name____________________________________________________ Phone______________________________
Step 5: Professionals or agencies I can contact during a crisis:
1. Clinician Name____________________________________________ Phone______________________________ Clinician Pager or Emergency Contact # _____________________
2. Clinician Name____________________________________________ Phone______________________________ Clinician Pager or Emergency Contact # ______________________
3. Local Urgent Care Services______________________________________________________________________
Urgent Care Services Address___________________________________________________________________ Urgent Care Services Phone_____________________________________________________________________
4. Suicide Prevention Lifeline Phone: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
Step 6: Making the environment safe:
1. _____________________________________________________________________________________________
2. _____________________________________________________________________________________________
The one thing that is most important to me and worth living for is: ________________________________________________________________
“Safety Plan Template ©2008 Barbara Stanley and Gregory K. Brown, is reprinted with the express permission of the authors. No portion of the Safety Plan Template may be reproduced without their express, written permission. You can contact the authors at bhs2@columbia.edu or gregbrow@mail.med.upenn.edu.”
A link about having a Safety Plan in order.
http://bpd.about.com/od/livingwithbpd/a/safety.htm
Suicide Prevention Contract
http://voices.yahoo.com/sample-suicide-prevention-contracts-aka-no-suicide-4890484.html
I am not a professional. If you need immediate attention please call the crisis line 1-800-273-TALK (8255). The information I have provided above is for informational purposes only. If you want to put a Safety Plan or Suicide Prevention Plan in place, contact your medical provider and they can assist you with this.
Release the guilt you are holding. It’s in the past, let it stay there. Forgive yourself and move on. Learn from your mistakes. Don’t live in regret, no need for that! Once you forgive yourself, there is no stopping how happy you can be! Live in the now! Be in the now! You can’t change what’s happened, so just move on. Today, you have the choice to let go of the past and be happy. You ARE strong! Allow yourself to be happy! You deserve it!!! ~ Bekr
Ahhh… It comes around every year, and every year I am reminded of what I will never have.
Mothers Day.
The commercials, the Facebook posts… I get to see it everywhere. It feels like I am being stabbed in the heart every time. I know this was my decision (partly, bc I was told I could probably not have children if I tried anyway). But I chose not to even try. I did this because it was the best choice, and I stand by it. But yet, every now and then, and especially on Mothers Day, I feel that pain… that emptiness… that gaping hole in my heart that nothing could ever replace it. A child I will never have. A child I will never hold. A child I will never tell how much they mean to me. A child who will never love me back. A bond that only a mother and child could have. I will never have any of this. But again, I made this choice, and for the most part, I am okay with. Every now and then, yes, I do feel cheated. I do feel angry, upset, frustrated and confused.
Being told by people “you would have been a great mother” doesn’t help at all either.
Yes, sometimes I contemplate “what if?” But I know deep down in my heart that it was the right choice. So why do I go through this every year and occasionally throughout the year? Shouldn’t I be used to it and just accept the fact that I will never have a child? Why can’t I just get over it?
